fuck.

seriously.
how did we know that you will want to shop and watch movie.
if you will to tell us, we might have went with you right.

i don't know lah.


if you think we didn't bother about you.
i tell you k.
i did worry okay.
i wonder was it right that non of us accompanied you.
but i figure that it should be okay.
since you've been doing it alone, and telling us to do it alone too.

i don't know about eddie.
but seriously.

i called you so many times already.
i just wanted to know where were you.
i asked if you ate already.
you could've just replied me, yes or no.
instead of pulling all the afternoon what money talk.
yes, i know money's a big issue in the family now.

but it's not as if i kept asking you fr money right?
it's not like i've never think about anything.
yes, i do ask for money, but i only ask when it's time for my allowance.
i don't ask like what 500 or 700 at one shot or what, what.
furthermore, the afternoon money incident was just a joke.
whether you increase my allowance or not, i'm fine with it.
i'm still living perfectly fine, what.

yes, i did compare about my allowance and all to eddie.
but it was just for fun, really.

yes, i'll be glad if you give me extra allowance, but.
i've never really written a what black and white, or demand like fuck for it right.
252 including transport, yes it might be little but whatever.

and then you finally came home.
daddy and i ask you anything all.
you were like okay i'm fine what all
ask where you went.
wah, watch movie and shopping all.
machiam enjoy life what.
then you were complaining what how lonely it was to watch movie alone, shop alone.

but really, have you ever thought how i felt when i was in Genting.
it was the SAME what.
but i never complained also.
i mean. yes, i did show you a black face. but i joked it off right.

i didn't of my phone and act like i'm missing and everything, what.
yesyesyes, foreign country right. cannot be missing right, cannot live without you right.
urghhhh.

i don't know lah.

i think you're having menopause.
rahhh. i hope it'll be better after you've calmed down and after i've blogged this out.


and to anyone who thinks i'm crazy, i think i'm having pms.
and if you think i'm unfilial, so be it.


it's tiring enough to be the 'thinking' one.
the older and more thoughtful one.
the one who has to think of her younger sibling, what to give, to share, to what don't know sacrifice all.
tried to be a good girl. but it's damn tiring ah.

i don't know.
maybe i'm not a good girl enough i guess.




it's so damn tiring.
everything.
urgh.